One kind of fear that exists in me
Is that the next moment I won’t see
That every second might be the last
That my dear life would end so fast
That I’ll too early be dead
Is one thing I really dread.
The second of my many fears
Is that I won’t, no matter what, succeed
Even if I live for many years
That failure is a kind of life I’ll lead
That I won’t make a tangible difference
That my long life won’t make any sense…
Another fear I diligently harbor
Is that if I do find success’ door
And I’m intelligent enough to open it
And I’m lucky enough to enter it
Will I let and help others come with me
Will I create and open other doors freely…
Yet another of my numerous fears is this
Will my parents be able to say out loud,
That truly I have made them proud
Will they praise and cheer me with ease?
Or will I be a mistake as their child
Will I be one classified as bad and wild?
My fears don’t end there
If I succeed in helping others
Will I be able to train my children?
Will they be pillars amongst their brethren?
Will I be among the successful fathers?
This is just another fear…
But the one fear that drowns all these
The one that truly gives me peace
One that I have harbored for years
One that towers over my other fears
The other fears are like kennels to me
This one is like a sky scraper you see…
It is the fear of the Almighty
The One who created me
As long as this fear doesn’t decrease
I know the others won’t increase
And if through my life it goes undiminished
Then I do believe it is mission accomplished!!!
proudly written by... R.j...
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Tales by phone light or computer light
Today marked the fourth week I’ve been attending classes. Sociology is one course I love so much (that’s cause it looks easy). The class was lively as usual, especially when the instructor asked us this question “if you were given excess change that and we didn’t return it should that be considered stealing?” A guy said, “maybe they want you to tell people that they are giving money at so-so place so people can flood the place.” Now I laughed heartily not only cause it was funny but then he was right… What’s my bizness if the cashier has issues with math. Or itz his buyday and he’z giving out money to celebrate it If he was silly enough to give me plus change, chances are he won’t even notice and everybody ends up happy… Notice I kept saying he? Well with a she, if she is sooooo fortunate to be good looking, she wouldn’t have the problem with me in the first place cuz I’d have told her to keep the change… and if the greenz are kinda low then I wouldn’t want a pretty laydee to get into trouble… you never can tell (*winks*) but if she’s.. you know na… then she must be punished… lol.. ok.. seriously… I personally would return the excess change… my mind no go rest… cuz hey I wuz ready to part with the money in the first place so why not just free ur mind… you get? Believe me I no holy pass ooo…
Ok.. that aside.. I didn’t come out my temporary writing retirement (why are you laughing? Drawing’s been taking lotta my spare tym so technically I temporarily retired from writing... need I tell you what's been taking my "unspare time"?) to bore you with school stuff… well I waz in the library (believe it or not I go library ooo) and I wuz facing a big problem… hell no!, not math or physics or any other course for that matter... if you had guessed gurl problem well… BULL’S EYE… I had walked into the library and my fav. seat wuz taken. I looked around and waz going to the right when I noticed a pretty looking laydee on the left… “Damn!!!” I said to myself “why on earth didn’t I see that quickly?” “Nothing spoil” I continued “He never spoil finish” so I continued towardz the right and went round a row of books and then came back to the spot I had seen the laydee. Of course I took a seat close to her and was doing stuff and listening to Naija songs and Gbenga Adeboye (it amuses me cuz I say to myself, “these american folks will flip if they hear what I’m listening to”). Tried reading a novel but wuz gerring bored and den I started drawing. I tried drawing the laydee but she just won’t stay still. So I drew one woman, I’m sure she’d have sued me to court for deformation of image (I didn’t go to law school, the knowledge of the law is inborn… lol). So PL (pretty laydee) wuz studying and I wuz studying too… not notes duuuuh!!! Her face when she wasn’t looking in my direction and she kinda looked cute too physically. One thing you should know bout me is I don’t lyk to “jump”. The norm for guyz’ll be to go over and start small talk but me, never!!! I just kept on looking at PL. then I got tired and decided to take a nap… had to leave my seat and went to take a more comfortable one… woke up and I waz in luck PL wuz still there… decided to go sit close to her, closer than I wuz before. But a voice kept saying to me “o ni fe te!!! berra sit down wia you are…” and I did. After awhile PL left with a friend who had joined her and I said to myself “the great jonjon has once again messed up” took another nap… and woke up… oh yeah!!! PL wuz there… Then a voice (not that first wicked one ooo) said “jonjon ashe oo tie le(you no tough reash)” so to prove this voice wrong I decided I waz gonna tlk to PL even if it’ll jus be Hi!!! Then the trauma started… standing up con turn wahala… my whole soul could have gone outta my body and the flesh wouldn’t have flinched… twaz rigid… then suddenly I stood up… went to the restroom… had to pee kee!!! Went back and resumed my rigid position… time waz running out and I waz feeling lyk tom cruise in mission impossible… just that this waznt a bomb and bad guyz no dey… dad waz supposed to pick me up at 2 o clock and twaz 1.30… “I’ll make my move when itz 1.45”… “at least if I mess up I fit run comot”… 1.50. “I’ll make my move when 1.55”… and then my body told rigidity VAMONOS!!! And bless the Lord it did… so I stood up and went out of the library… and then I turned back… and went in again… and went to sit at PL’s table…
“Hi!”
“Hi, can I help you?”
“I don’t have a problem so I don’t need help”
“Oh! Sorry then”
“Wait! I do have a problem… may I know your name?
“Why would you want to know my name, do you want to arrest me? I didn’t shoot the guy, my friend did”
“N…no…no… (damn! I should have said yes)”
“Then what do you want my name for?”
“I just want to know your name, my name is Rashid”
“so? Wait! are you a terrorist?
“of course not! ok if that’s not okay wiv you can I have your number?”
“What are you? Stupid? I don’t want to give you my name and you think I’ll give you my number?”
“I… I… it… I… I’m sorry”
“You should be, now stop disturbing me and shoo off”
“Ok!”
Didn’t move…
“what’s the problem Mr terrorist”
Just wondering if I can have ur address?”
“Will you shut up and disappear before I call security”
“Yes! I’ll shut up ma’am”
“Are you a Nigerian?”
Ok… now at this point I gotta tell you that before that question “are you a Nigerian?” the conversation wuz being played in my head and I wuz beezee smiling at the stupid idiot messing himself up in my head… it wuz funny… now back to the conversation… the real one….
“yes”… I must tell you though I had thought PL to be a Nigerian too but I waznt sure… plenty people don shock me… people wiv faces of a typical agbero in oshodi would speak wiv an accent lyk dt of will smith… so I waznt sure but with the question I confirmed that I truly am a Nigerian identifier… lol… ok the convo went on and on… dint get her number… when I wanted to ask I remembered the response I had made in my head (what are you? Stupid?) popped up sharp sharp… gat her name though… sounds nice but I cant pronounce it… lol… but koko be say finally I think I just made my first friend.. yeeeeeeeaaaaaaw!!!
Do note though that it dint really go this way… just added a little sugar and salt and magi to make it interesting… hope you enjoyed it… I know I enjoyed writing it… lol… it’s the one and only, the numero uno, the sole and proud and true owner of the name jonjon deboy…. Lol.. saying adios mis amigos… or berra yet.. Asta la vista Baybees (mimickin’ Arnold)…
Ok.. that aside.. I didn’t come out my temporary writing retirement (why are you laughing? Drawing’s been taking lotta my spare tym so technically I temporarily retired from writing... need I tell you what's been taking my "unspare time"?) to bore you with school stuff… well I waz in the library (believe it or not I go library ooo) and I wuz facing a big problem… hell no!, not math or physics or any other course for that matter... if you had guessed gurl problem well… BULL’S EYE… I had walked into the library and my fav. seat wuz taken. I looked around and waz going to the right when I noticed a pretty looking laydee on the left… “Damn!!!” I said to myself “why on earth didn’t I see that quickly?” “Nothing spoil” I continued “He never spoil finish” so I continued towardz the right and went round a row of books and then came back to the spot I had seen the laydee. Of course I took a seat close to her and was doing stuff and listening to Naija songs and Gbenga Adeboye (it amuses me cuz I say to myself, “these american folks will flip if they hear what I’m listening to”). Tried reading a novel but wuz gerring bored and den I started drawing. I tried drawing the laydee but she just won’t stay still. So I drew one woman, I’m sure she’d have sued me to court for deformation of image (I didn’t go to law school, the knowledge of the law is inborn… lol). So PL (pretty laydee) wuz studying and I wuz studying too… not notes duuuuh!!! Her face when she wasn’t looking in my direction and she kinda looked cute too physically. One thing you should know bout me is I don’t lyk to “jump”. The norm for guyz’ll be to go over and start small talk but me, never!!! I just kept on looking at PL. then I got tired and decided to take a nap… had to leave my seat and went to take a more comfortable one… woke up and I waz in luck PL wuz still there… decided to go sit close to her, closer than I wuz before. But a voice kept saying to me “o ni fe te!!! berra sit down wia you are…” and I did. After awhile PL left with a friend who had joined her and I said to myself “the great jonjon has once again messed up” took another nap… and woke up… oh yeah!!! PL wuz there… Then a voice (not that first wicked one ooo) said “jonjon ashe oo tie le(you no tough reash)” so to prove this voice wrong I decided I waz gonna tlk to PL even if it’ll jus be Hi!!! Then the trauma started… standing up con turn wahala… my whole soul could have gone outta my body and the flesh wouldn’t have flinched… twaz rigid… then suddenly I stood up… went to the restroom… had to pee kee!!! Went back and resumed my rigid position… time waz running out and I waz feeling lyk tom cruise in mission impossible… just that this waznt a bomb and bad guyz no dey… dad waz supposed to pick me up at 2 o clock and twaz 1.30… “I’ll make my move when itz 1.45”… “at least if I mess up I fit run comot”… 1.50. “I’ll make my move when 1.55”… and then my body told rigidity VAMONOS!!! And bless the Lord it did… so I stood up and went out of the library… and then I turned back… and went in again… and went to sit at PL’s table…
“Hi!”
“Hi, can I help you?”
“I don’t have a problem so I don’t need help”
“Oh! Sorry then”
“Wait! I do have a problem… may I know your name?
“Why would you want to know my name, do you want to arrest me? I didn’t shoot the guy, my friend did”
“N…no…no… (damn! I should have said yes)”
“Then what do you want my name for?”
“I just want to know your name, my name is Rashid”
“so? Wait! are you a terrorist?
“of course not! ok if that’s not okay wiv you can I have your number?”
“What are you? Stupid? I don’t want to give you my name and you think I’ll give you my number?”
“I… I… it… I… I’m sorry”
“You should be, now stop disturbing me and shoo off”
“Ok!”
Didn’t move…
“what’s the problem Mr terrorist”
Just wondering if I can have ur address?”
“Will you shut up and disappear before I call security”
“Yes! I’ll shut up ma’am”
“Are you a Nigerian?”
Ok… now at this point I gotta tell you that before that question “are you a Nigerian?” the conversation wuz being played in my head and I wuz beezee smiling at the stupid idiot messing himself up in my head… it wuz funny… now back to the conversation… the real one….
“yes”… I must tell you though I had thought PL to be a Nigerian too but I waznt sure… plenty people don shock me… people wiv faces of a typical agbero in oshodi would speak wiv an accent lyk dt of will smith… so I waznt sure but with the question I confirmed that I truly am a Nigerian identifier… lol… ok the convo went on and on… dint get her number… when I wanted to ask I remembered the response I had made in my head (what are you? Stupid?) popped up sharp sharp… gat her name though… sounds nice but I cant pronounce it… lol… but koko be say finally I think I just made my first friend.. yeeeeeeeaaaaaaw!!!
Do note though that it dint really go this way… just added a little sugar and salt and magi to make it interesting… hope you enjoyed it… I know I enjoyed writing it… lol… it’s the one and only, the numero uno, the sole and proud and true owner of the name jonjon deboy…. Lol.. saying adios mis amigos… or berra yet.. Asta la vista Baybees (mimickin’ Arnold)…
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